The Art of Letting People Do What They Want to Do

Why is it so hard to let people do what they want to do?  I try to come across as all "loosey goosey," (Can you tell I am still reading Anne of Green Gables?) but actually can be quite controlling.  Obviously, my way is the best.

When I am on my evening walks, I can't help but rearrange people's artwork - as I quickly glance at their living room.  (Did you know most people hang their art too high?)  I also shake my head when people center a lamp in their picture window.   Who am I to even have an opinion on what people do in their own house?  Maybe really tall people live in the house with artwork hanging inches from the ceiling.  Maybe people center their lamps because their grandmothers did - which is actually very sweet.  (I painted my bathroom the same color as my grandma's bathroom.  Pink.  If you are a single lady, you can have a pink bathroom.  No clearance necessary.)

My kids are at the age where they need less control and more freedom.  This is hard. It was easier when I could just give them a handful of Cheerios and a sippy cup of watered down apple juice.  I could dose out screen time and know Bob the Builder wouldn't curse and the Bubble Guppies wouldn't swim off to smoke a doobie.  

Now it is difficult to monitor screen time and know what they are watching.  (Especially since kids are given chromebooks to do the majority of their school work on, but that is for another post.)  I used to hate it when people would spurt out, "Little kids - little problems.  Big kids - big problems."  At the time, I seriously didn't get it.  Lulu, my youngest, giving up napping at 13 months was a BIG problem.  Leonard, my oldest, getting kicked out of home day cares because he wouldn't nap was a BIG problem.  (Gus's BIG problem then and now is that he is the middle child.)  

I am starting to understand the big problem is that I have to let things go and let my kids make their own choices, trusting I have pounded some common sense into them.  For example, I have to let Leonard read Stephen King without reading it first myself. (Stephen King has written at least 90 books - who has time for that besides a 7th grader on summer vacation?)  Don't worry.  I am not naive enough to think my biggest parenting problem will be Stephen King.  

Hmmm.  Maybe I should start with baby steps - like letting people hang their art however they want.  No judgment. They can do what they want. 

Prairie Eydie