The Art of Aging - Part III

Just another Saturday morning at Prairie Sherry's house.  Hopefully she'll invite me over for a cuppa joe after she finishes her chores. 

NOTE:  If you want to check out more of Prairie Sherry's musings, check out the blog we co-created:  http://www.prairiegrlz.blogspot.com. Her most popular blog was, "Did Ma Wear a Bra?"  It has the in-depth reporting you'd expect from a Prairie Grl.   

 

Let's continue our "Art of Aging" journey with an interview from, friend of the blog, Prairie Sherry. 

 

Setting:  A Saturday morning at Lazy Jane's Café.  We find out heroine, semi-retired from an expansive career in education,  tucking into a delicious pecan pancake.  A steaming cup of dark roast is waiting for her attention.  

 

Prairie Eydie:  What would you say are the best things about aging?

 

Prairie Sherry:  The ability to try things and not worry about consequences because you'll be dead soon.  I have done more things since turning 60 than I have done in years.  (Don't let this statement mislead you.  Sharon has done PLENTY prior to turning 60.)

 

Prairie Eydie:  Like what?

 

Too bad Sharon didn't ask me before going under the needle.  This would have made quite a statement tattoo.

Prairie Sherry:

•  working out (I am happy to report that even though Sharon wears leggings to work out in, she hasn't joined the legions of people wearing leggings as pants.)
• getting my first tattoo (A chickadee on her forearm.  I personally would have recommended a Garth Williams illustration of Laura Ingalls Wilder and her sister Mary playing with a pig's bladder.) 
• going on vacations to relax and not feeling obliged to do "touristy" things
• growing my hair out
• no more "To Do" lists (Gasp.  This is actually more shocking that Sharon growing her hair out.)
• abandoning books and movies I don't like
• giving myself permission to buy the laundry sorter I always dreamed of  (Too bad she didn't give herself permission to do this when her three daughters were at home.)
• not having to host play dates unless it is with my grandchildren
• spending money on quality groceries and not eating junk (I am pretty sure the "junk" Sharon is referring to is inexpensive ground beef.)

 

Prairie Eydie:  What are the worst things about aging?

 

 

 Prairie Eydie:  Surely there are some downsides to aging. 

 

 

Prairie Sherry:  Well, being "talked around" by younger people is annoying.  It is like they think I couldn't possibly be funny or tuned into what they are saying because I am older.  I also don't like it when people assume I can't lift heavy boxes.  (Personally, I love it when people make this assumption about me.)

 

I don't care how timeless this book is - I am not adding it to my summer reading list.



 

Here is an idea for Sharon's next tattoo.

 

. . . and the interview pretty much deteriorated from here.  I asked Sharon what her favorite books were and she couldn't come up with any titles.  ("Senior Moment" Sharon?)  Finally she thought of Watership Down, by Richard Adams.  This being one of the few fantasy books she has ever gotten into.   

 

You know.  That Bruce song when he sings about loyalty and looks really intense when he sings it?  You know that song.  Right???

 

 I then asked Sharon about her all time favorite songs.  Her favorite song is Bruce Springsteen's "If I Should Fall" - even though I had to tell her what the title was.  To her credit, she did know the song was about someone falling behind.  

 

Until next time,

Prairie Eydie

 

 

The Art of Aging - Part II

 

Next year I will be 50.  I have been exploring the "Yippees" of aging and now it is time for the "Oh really?  That happens" of aging.

 

Your eyesight is going suddenly start getting worse.  It will begin with you not being able to read menus at restaurants.  You will blame the poor lighting.  It will progress to not being able to read the playing cards for "Killer Bunnies." (This is actually mini blessing.)  You will blame the small print.

 

 

I wanted to look like this in my readers.  Pulled together,  intelligent, with a hip vibe.  I even did a Google search on Oprah's favorite lip colors in preparation for the arrival of my new Peepers. 

 

 After months of squinting at print, holding recipes at arm's length, and debating making an eye exam, it will finally dawn on you to buy readers.  You know, the glasses your third grade teacher wore at the end of her nose.   Months ago, I threw a multi-pack of readers into my cart at Costco (You can find the readers behind the imported cheese and Costco employee handing out samples of prosciutto.) and those worked fine until I decided I wanted to look cooler.  Of course, I turned to  Ms. Oprah Winfrey for wisdom.  After a 15 second Google search, I ordered the readers Oprah recommended (Peepers Specs) and anxiously awaited their arrival.  

 

 

None of that pulled together, intelligent, hip vibe carried over.  Sigh.  I don't even think the right lip color would help.

 



I seem to be channeling more of the "Professor Trelawney Vibe" from the Harry Potter movies.  Definitely NOT what I was shooting for. 

 

My new readers arrived on a Friday afternoon and I took it as a sign I was going to have an amazing weekend.  That euphoria lasted until I put the readers on.  They were and are HUGE!  I would definitely not be able to wear them at school, where I desperately need them for read alouds. (Imagine the nicknames my students would come up with.) I have since decided that they are amazing readers because they are so large.  They magnify everything in my range of vision and don't look too bad with my jammies as they will remain my "Stay at Home" readers.

 

 

 

 

Moving on.  You will find yourself not being chosen to serve on committees at work.  You will take on an invisibility - as if wearing an invisibility cloak.  (Again, you Harry Potter fans know what I am talking about.)  My personal invisibility cloak turns me into a veteran teacher, who drives a  Honda van, and eats too much trail mix which is why she has embraced  Costco stretchy jeans. 

 

When I was younger teacher, I was often chosen to be on committees, lead initiatives, and pilot educational programs.  I am not sure if being passed over for interesting assignments is due to my disinterest in technology (Did you know Steve Jobs didn't give his kids ipads?) OR if it is due to my age.  Hopefully it isn't due to my cranky personality before 8th hour.   More on this in a later post.

 

 

I couldn't resist.  If you are not a Harry Potter fan, you need to become one.  I too resisted for many, many years.  (19 to be exact.)

 

Years ago, I was at a coffee shop with my grandma.  While we were drinking our coffee, a son of my grandma's friend came to our table.  Let's call him, Harry.  Harry hugged my grandma and asked her questions about her latest series of paintings.  Harry then went to get our coffee cups refilled before heading on his way.    I remember grandma saying, "I like him because he doesn't ignore old people."  At the time, I wasn't sure what she meant, but I get it now. 

 

Let's get out there and value people of all ages.  We all have things to contribute and learn from each other.  It will be a beautiful "Kumbaya Moment."  Promise. 

 

Prairie Eydie

 

 

 

      

 



The Art of Aging - Bonus Blog

 

I have been pulling this stunt since I was a teenager.

NOTE:  My last blog discussed the good things about aging.  After posting the blog, I remembered a couple more "Yahoos" about aging.  (NO - it wasn't a "Senior Moment".  I hate that term and people should stop embracing it immediately.  Saying it doesn't make you look cute while you search for your glasses.)

 

Okay.  A few more pros of aging.

 

Admit it.  You do it too.

I now throw empty peanut butter containers in the garbage.  Skipping over the thirty minute task of washing it out so it can go in the recycling.  I will make up for my peanut butter container sins through composting.  Promise.  I have also been known to throw out sheets after my kids puke on them.  These are horrible, horrible things to admit, but doing them adds some sanity to my life.  Aren't sheets biodegradable?

 

Now that I am older, My hair is getting the attention it deserves.  I spend a fair amount to get my hair highlighted and trimmed.  Pricey eye brow wax?  Yes please - since it is the closest I will get to a face lift.  Over the years, I have saved money by coloring my own hair and waiting 5 months between hair cuts.  No more.  This did nothing for my self-esteem, people.  I want to get compliments, not uneasy stares.   

 

I wonder who was cutting Paul's hair? 

Gone are the days of having my college roommate cut my bangs.  Once she cut my bangs SO short, my neighbor compared me to Paul Simon, back when he was with Garfunkel.  (I guess my roommate either didn't allow for shrinkage or she kept trying to even the bangs out. )

 

Until next time,

Prairie Eydie

 



Maybe Paul was just going through his "Nero" phase.





The Art of Aging - Part 1

 

Can we talk?   Next year I will be 50 and I have been thinking about the aging process.  Let's explore the good and bad things about aging and how running a half-marathon is not in my future.  Today, let's look at the good things about aging.

 

Could someone please bring this lady a sandwich?  Or a ham?

 

 I am spending less and less money at Sephora on make-up.  Truthfully,  I am spending no money at Sephora.  I'm not sure why this happened.  Maybe it's because I never reapply my lipstick after 6:45 AM.  Most of my lipstick immediately adheres to my Starbucks cup and stays there.  It is an easy way to tell my cup from other people's cup.  Personally, I am in awe of people who remember to reapply their lipstick after lunch.   

 

I recently did buy three different colors of blush from the Clinique counter.  The Clinique guy taught me how to sweep the blush on in layers so I could enjoy the fleeting illusion of cheekbone.  I am not sure I am applying it right.  My cheeks have more of the eighties "blush stripes" than sexy definition. I was hoping to look like I was skipping my mid-morning snack.  Maybe I need another lesson from the Clinique guy?   (I won't get into the anxiety surrounding a guy teaching me how to put on make-up.  I know this is archaic thinking, but it is like having a guy measure me for a bra.) 

 

 

Hey James!  Thank you for letting your audience sit during your concerts.  You rock, man!

I can be in my jammies by 6:45 PM and not feel obligated to go "out." "Out" used to mean going somewhere to see a band, standing until 12:15 AM, shouting at people to be heard over the music, and going home with beer bloat.  Ugh. I only want to see James Taylor, since I can just sit there, sing along in my head, order a Dixie cup full of Chardonnay, and be home by 10:15.  Nowadays, it seems like everyone wants to go "out" and stencil things on barn boards.  Sometimes I worry about myself, because I have no desire to record when my family was established on a barn board. 

 

 

 

 

I no longer wash my hair everyday.  I used to dutifully start every morning washing/conditioning my hair.  Then I would juggle a round brush, hairdryer, and cuppa coffee for about 35 minutes.  Granted, this did account for some nice definition in my triceps, but who wants to do this everyday when someone has invented dry shampoo?  I now have lunches to make, green smoothies to blend, and podcasts to listen to.  Day 3 of dry shampoo isn't pretty, but I don't care enough to get in the shower and actually wash my hair.

 

I told you, Stacy and Clinton.  Me in a pencil skirt is not a pretty sight.

I can easily ignore those lists of "What Not to Wear When You are Over 40."  (There is probably some 26 year old guy writing these lists.)  Red lipstick, leopard print and short sleeves continue to be part of my life.  I have spent years figuring out my style and I am not going to start over because someone is uncomfortable looking at my arms.  These lists tell women in their forties to wear crisp white button downs, fitted navy blazers, and pencil skirts.  Really?  I have made it to 49 and now have to worry about keeping button down shirts crisp and clean?  No thanks.

 

 

Finally, I have stopping caring about what others think of me.  I embrace the statement, "What you think of me is none of my business."  Let me clarify that I am not one of those people who blurt out insane things because they can.  (I think that happens when you turn 68 or something.)  I don't say things like:  I never understood why you were known for your baked beans.  To me they taste like nasty little bullets.  OR  Those poems you are always writing and reading out loud?  Well.  Maybe they should just stay private, in your notebook. 

What are you noticing about aging?  Next time, we will explore the downsides of aging. 

 

Prairie Eydie