The Art of Aging - Bonus Blog

 

I have been pulling this stunt since I was a teenager.

NOTE:  My last blog discussed the good things about aging.  After posting the blog, I remembered a couple more "Yahoos" about aging.  (NO - it wasn't a "Senior Moment".  I hate that term and people should stop embracing it immediately.  Saying it doesn't make you look cute while you search for your glasses.)

 

Okay.  A few more pros of aging.

 

Admit it.  You do it too.

I now throw empty peanut butter containers in the garbage.  Skipping over the thirty minute task of washing it out so it can go in the recycling.  I will make up for my peanut butter container sins through composting.  Promise.  I have also been known to throw out sheets after my kids puke on them.  These are horrible, horrible things to admit, but doing them adds some sanity to my life.  Aren't sheets biodegradable?

 

Now that I am older, My hair is getting the attention it deserves.  I spend a fair amount to get my hair highlighted and trimmed.  Pricey eye brow wax?  Yes please - since it is the closest I will get to a face lift.  Over the years, I have saved money by coloring my own hair and waiting 5 months between hair cuts.  No more.  This did nothing for my self-esteem, people.  I want to get compliments, not uneasy stares.   

 

I wonder who was cutting Paul's hair? 

Gone are the days of having my college roommate cut my bangs.  Once she cut my bangs SO short, my neighbor compared me to Paul Simon, back when he was with Garfunkel.  (I guess my roommate either didn't allow for shrinkage or she kept trying to even the bangs out. )

 

Until next time,

Prairie Eydie

 



Maybe Paul was just going through his "Nero" phase.





The Art of Aging - Part 1

 

Can we talk?   Next year I will be 50 and I have been thinking about the aging process.  Let's explore the good and bad things about aging and how running a half-marathon is not in my future.  Today, let's look at the good things about aging.

 

Could someone please bring this lady a sandwich?  Or a ham?

 

 I am spending less and less money at Sephora on make-up.  Truthfully,  I am spending no money at Sephora.  I'm not sure why this happened.  Maybe it's because I never reapply my lipstick after 6:45 AM.  Most of my lipstick immediately adheres to my Starbucks cup and stays there.  It is an easy way to tell my cup from other people's cup.  Personally, I am in awe of people who remember to reapply their lipstick after lunch.   

 

I recently did buy three different colors of blush from the Clinique counter.  The Clinique guy taught me how to sweep the blush on in layers so I could enjoy the fleeting illusion of cheekbone.  I am not sure I am applying it right.  My cheeks have more of the eighties "blush stripes" than sexy definition. I was hoping to look like I was skipping my mid-morning snack.  Maybe I need another lesson from the Clinique guy?   (I won't get into the anxiety surrounding a guy teaching me how to put on make-up.  I know this is archaic thinking, but it is like having a guy measure me for a bra.) 

 

 

Hey James!  Thank you for letting your audience sit during your concerts.  You rock, man!

I can be in my jammies by 6:45 PM and not feel obligated to go "out." "Out" used to mean going somewhere to see a band, standing until 12:15 AM, shouting at people to be heard over the music, and going home with beer bloat.  Ugh. I only want to see James Taylor, since I can just sit there, sing along in my head, order a Dixie cup full of Chardonnay, and be home by 10:15.  Nowadays, it seems like everyone wants to go "out" and stencil things on barn boards.  Sometimes I worry about myself, because I have no desire to record when my family was established on a barn board. 

 

 

 

 

I no longer wash my hair everyday.  I used to dutifully start every morning washing/conditioning my hair.  Then I would juggle a round brush, hairdryer, and cuppa coffee for about 35 minutes.  Granted, this did account for some nice definition in my triceps, but who wants to do this everyday when someone has invented dry shampoo?  I now have lunches to make, green smoothies to blend, and podcasts to listen to.  Day 3 of dry shampoo isn't pretty, but I don't care enough to get in the shower and actually wash my hair.

 

I told you, Stacy and Clinton.  Me in a pencil skirt is not a pretty sight.

I can easily ignore those lists of "What Not to Wear When You are Over 40."  (There is probably some 26 year old guy writing these lists.)  Red lipstick, leopard print and short sleeves continue to be part of my life.  I have spent years figuring out my style and I am not going to start over because someone is uncomfortable looking at my arms.  These lists tell women in their forties to wear crisp white button downs, fitted navy blazers, and pencil skirts.  Really?  I have made it to 49 and now have to worry about keeping button down shirts crisp and clean?  No thanks.

 

 

Finally, I have stopping caring about what others think of me.  I embrace the statement, "What you think of me is none of my business."  Let me clarify that I am not one of those people who blurt out insane things because they can.  (I think that happens when you turn 68 or something.)  I don't say things like:  I never understood why you were known for your baked beans.  To me they taste like nasty little bullets.  OR  Those poems you are always writing and reading out loud?  Well.  Maybe they should just stay private, in your notebook. 

What are you noticing about aging?  Next time, we will explore the downsides of aging. 

 

Prairie Eydie

 

 

 

The Art of Revisiting New Year's Resolutions

Retro Fisher Price Little People just inspire awesomeness.

 

March seems like a good month to remind myself that I even wrote resolutions in January.  I have discovered the key to becoming a little better everyday is knowing how to be flexible. 

 

 

 

 

February was a big, fat resolution wash-out month.  My kids and I passed around the same illness two times and my antibiotic resistant sinus headaches returned. 

 

It turns out I had to write resolutions specifically for February.  Here are some of my "February Only" resolutions:

 

• Clean up vomit before needing to scrape vomit up with a spatula.
• Find two new podcasts to listen to while staring at ceiling wondering if it is worth taking everyone to Urgent Care.  (Two new favorite podcasts are History Chicks and Pod Save America.)
• Do five rounds of deep breathing while listening to kids "seal cough" in unison at 2:00 AM.
• Rationalize that cereal bowls of White Cheddar Skinny Pop could be considered dinner somewhere.

 

I had to accept that February was a crud month and be grateful I got through it with slim shreds of sanity intact.  Now that it is March, I am ready to revisit my January resolutions and march on.  Here is my round-up of how things are going.  

 

WORKOUTS:  I am able to get in two work outs a week, with a third workout sprinkled in here and there.  I was listening to a Dr. Zorba "On Your Health" podcast.  He cited research that said being a Weekend Workout Warrior (i.e. getting all your workouts in on the weekend) is almost as beneficial as spacing your workouts throughout the week.

 

 

 

PLAYDATES:  Two play dates happened in January and one in March.  That is an increase of 300%  from last year  (Right???).  After much reflection - I think I need to start inviting my friends over for more play dates.  My friends tend to not scream and build forts in the living room.  Plus they can drink wine.

 

 

My family looks nothing like this freaky, well-coiffed family on the cover.  Last night I lived through Gus making coconut shrimp.  It seemed simple enough, but it pretty much glopped up every bowl in the kitchen.    

 

 

REAL FOOD DINNERS:  Real food and sit down dinners are actually going great and I thought it would be the hardest resolution.  I definitely do spend way more time in the kitchen for prep and clean-up, but the time is worth it.

 

 

I am supposed to be reading the directions for this game.  I don't think I have ever read directions for ANYTHING - which could explain quite a few things.

 

 

FAMILY GAME NIGHT: This has fallen off the schedule, but it will premier again this week.  Tah Dah!  As long as I know it will be over in an hour,  I can do it!

 

Meet my workout pal, Bob.  He doesn't seem to mind if I stay at Level 1 for weeks and weeks.   

 

 

What about you?  How are your resolutions going?  Okay.  Off to work out.

 

Prairie Eydie

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Art of Accepting and Expecting

Gretchen Rubin, of Happiness Project fame, says:

 

 

I used to focus only on expecting more from myself.  I would come up with crazy goals.  Take my writing goal for example.  

 

It looks like an inspiring book, right?  The mountain, the birds, the soothing colors. . .

 

I used to be a follower of Julia Cameron's program laid out in the The Artist's Way.  (Okay, follower is too strong of a word. I owned the book and read many pages in it.)  A cornerstone of her program is to write three morning pages in your journal right after you wake up.  In theory, the "Morning Pages" practice could lead you to a clearer mind, less anxiety, and better ideas. 

 

 

Anna:  Duke must you wear a kilt to our wedding?  Duke:  Oh Anna.   We have been through so much together.  Starvation.  The Police Commissioner election.  Avalanches.  Pirates.  Surely we can get past this wedding kilt. 

 

Dutifully, I would set my alarm clock to 4:15 AM so I could write my 3 morning pages.  Because I am from the Midwest, I consistently filled those spiral notebook pages even though I HATED every minute of it.  I wrote grocery lists.  I wrote dialogue for Duke and Anna of General Hospital fame.  I wrote free verse poetry about teaching.  I wrote "I have nothing to write" over and over.  For me, the morning page practice lead to anxiety, dumb ideas, and foggy brain.

 

Now I accept myself and my writing practice.  I keep a one sentence journal.  Every day I write one sentence that sums up the day.  It is okay if the sentences are run-ons because no one is correcting my work.  Here are some of my journal entries:

 

Nov. 24 - I didn't want to cook a Thanksgiving meal, so Gus and I grilled steaks.

 

July 12 - I made two batches of coleslaw today to use up the CSA cabbage and then I got another cabbage in today's CSA share.

 

Aug. 22 - I bought plants back to school today and then left immediately.

 

One sentence can bring back memories of wonderful meals, transitions, and happiness.  I remember August 22, 2016.  It was a super hot day and two of my plants tipped over in the back of my van.  In fact, the dirt is still there!  I had just moved classrooms, again, and was breaking tasks into manageable steps. 

 

Seriously?  Another cabbage?

 

 I still write, of course, but I write when it works into my schedule.  Also, my writing practice doesn't include filling in three pages in my notebook and waking up at 4:15.  It is a balance between  accepting and expecting. 

 

 

 

The Art of Beating the January Blahs

 

 

The January blahs are settling in and taking root.  The twinkling Christmas lights have been packed up.  Your jeans are tighter than in October and you insist on blaming the drier.  The next holiday is Valentine's Day and you don't have the heart, or social life, to fully embrace it.  It is easy to say, "Welcome winter blahs!  I have been expecting you."  And then be in a bad mood until April when you see your first robin and finally snap out of it. 

 

I am a BIG fan of Reading Rainbow.  If you enjoy being read to, check out Levar Burton reading The Watsons Go to Birmingham - 1963.  It is such a treat!

 

It takes strength to avoid being the grouch no one sits by at staff meetings.  This year, I am taking steps to plunge through the winter months without gaining 8 extra pounds and spending my evenings swaddled in a musty quilt.  My first step is going to involve reading more Young Adult (YA) literature.  Many YA books are short, magical, thought provoking, and you will probably learn something new before you flip to the final page.  If you are drawing a blank on books titles, I have some suggestions.  

 

 

The Candy Bomber, by Michael O. Tunnell (A SHORT memoir - peppered with period photographs)

 

Here is your chance to finally understand the beginning of the Cold War and the Berlin Airlift.  (I took a class on the Cold War in High School and can say I consistently snoozed through the semester.  I had no idea what was going on.  The teacher made a risky move of assuming his students understood The Cold War before signing up for the class.)  You will meet Michael and learn how he "bombs" the children of East Berlin with chocolates tied to hankie parachutes.  Yes, things were complicated back then, but fortunately the hysteria surrounding white sugar hadn't started.     My son recommended this book to me and said I would have a renewed sense of hope after reading the final page.  He was right. 

 

 

 

The One and Only Ivan, by Katherine Applegate (MAGICAL) 

 

This was my favorite book of 2016.  My Starbucks friend, Kristen, bought me the collector's edition for Christmas.  It is oversized and filled with colored illustrations.  Normally I avoid books with talking animals and dogs on the cover, but Ivan (the gorilla narrator) is funny, observant, and has true grit.  Find out how Ivan saves his young elephant friend, Ruby.  This gem is based on a true story.   

 

 

The Serpent King, by Jeff Zentner  (THOUGHT PROVOKING)

 

Zentner, a musician turned writer, gives voice to three seniors (Dill, Travis, and Lydia) living in a small town in Tennessee. They are unlikely friends with difficult pasts.  (Well, not Lydia.  She is the Molly Ringwald of the book.)  The Serpent King got me thinking about my High School dreams, which led me to think about dreams and aspiration of my friends, students, and kids. If you have watched The Breakfast Club more than once, then this book is for you.  Note:  This book is most appropriate for 9th grade and up.  It contains no talking animals.

 

 

 

LEARN SOMETHING

 

I love learning while reading, it compels me to read more.  Googling to find out more is just part of reading YA books.   Here are two of my favorites books that I read every year with my students.  I could go so far as to say, these books were life changing.

 

 

Small Steps, by Peg Kehret  (A Memoir about polio.)

A Long Walk to Water, by Linda Sue Park (The Lost Boys of Sudan)

 

What books are helping you beat the winter blahs?  Any life changing books I should get my hands on? Happy reading.

 

Prairie Eydie

 

   

 

The Art of Beginning a New Year - Part II

Much of my inspiration comes from Ernie.

 

I wrote 12 resolutions this year.  I intentionally set out to write a dozen because I like the number 12.   There are  - -

• 12 days of Christmas
• 12  months in the year
• 12 people who have walked on the moon
• 12 letters in the Hawaiian alphabet & I remember really liking turning and being 12 years old.

 

I know you are thinking 12 is really ambitious and I should probably reread my post titled, "The Art of Beginning a New Year - Part I."  I want to set myself up for success and be a proud, card carrying member of the 15%  of people who actually keep their New Year's resolutions.  I made sure my resolutions were obtainable, valuable, and somewhat measurable.  I keep track of progress with tally marks on a rustic (i.e. not cute) chart I zipped up on my lunch hour.

 

Here are some of my resolutions:

 

I will work out two times a week.  Workouts can be 30 minutes and walking counts.  ("Old Me" would have insisted on working out for an hour, four to five times a week with an intimidating, unlikeable personal trainer thrown in.  "New Me" is mature enough to realize exercising twice a week is better than my current zero times a week.)

 

 

 

I will let my kids invite friends over at least once a month.  (This one is painful for me.  Let's face it.  I had kids later in life, I teach middle school, and am somewhat of an introvert.  This all adds up to me wanting to escape children during my free time, despite liking my kids' friends.  But I swear "New Me" can rally.  I figure all the friends can come over on the same day.  It will be like ripping off the Band-Aid in one quick yank.)

 

 

 

I will cook "Real Food" dinner at least three times a week.  This will piggyback on teaching my kids both manners and how to cook.  (Several weeks ago I ordered 100 Days of Real Food - Real Fast.  I have periodic panic attacks about not teaching my kids how to cook and not springing for organic milk.  Then I have  anger attacks because I have to do all the cooking and buy all the milk.  Rather than continuing my panic and anger attacks, I decided to be proactive and start cooking dinner with my family.  So far, the kids have liked all the recipes from 100 Days of Real Food and haven't whined about helping in the kitchen.  Wait, Lulu was repulsed by the beef chili and made herself a stack of delish, buttered carbs, I mean tortillas, instead.  There is always room for improvement.) 

 

 

 

We will have family game night twice a month and it has to last for at least an hour.  (I like playing games with the kids, especially since they have passed the Chutes and Ladder and Candy Land phase.  My oldest requested that I update our board game collection since he has been playing the same games for most of his life.  I found myself on Amazon ordering questionable games like: Betrayal at House on the Hill, Exploding Kittens, and Killer Bunnies.  This Saturday my parents are coming over for a game afternoon.  I am particularly thrilled because this allows me to meet yet another resolution - I will visit my parents, with my kids, at least one time a month.  Check and Check.)

 

 

In a brilliant move, I taped the resolutions to my bedroom door so I will remember them.  In past years I have written resolutions in notebooks, closed the notebook, and that was the end of those resolutions.  Accountability is very important with resolutions.  And, who better to keep me accountable than my own children?  I enjoy getting nagged about "Game Night" while brushing my teeth. 

 

I would LOVE to hear about your plans for 2017.

 

Prairie Eydie

 

P.S.  My 12 resolutions have all been approved by my friend, Ellen.  I can now safely say I will be among the 15% who are still working on their resolutions in March.  Not so sure about June.   

 

 

 

 

The Art of Beginning a New Year - Part I

 

 

We have all made it through the holidays.  I just finished packing away the last Yoda-Wearing-a-Santa-Hat ornament and throwing the remaining Christmas cookies in the outside trash can (I can't trust myself to throw cookies in the kitchen trash because I might fish them out during a 4:00 PM energy slump emergency.) 

 

Truth?  I am feeling bloated and not prepared for 2017.  It is that bitter cold time of year, in Wisconsin, when I rush home to put on my stretchy PJ pants and oversized, stained t-shirt. I have been spending hours watching Millie, our new kitten, play with her glitter balls.  Yes.  It is time to craft some 2017 resolutions.

 

 

 

 

Travel back in time with me to January 2013.  This was the last time I wrote resolutions.  My marriage was ending.  It was snowing A LOT and I had thrown out my back trying to start the snow blower.   Plus, my three kids still needed meals and snacks DAILY.  I was clearly overwhelmed. 

 

The ears and bow are cute and all, but I would run the marathon dressed as Snow White.

 

So I did what all overwhelmed people do, I started writing New Year's Resolutions.  And I did not stop at 1 or 2 paltry weight loss goals.  I crafted a detailed, 14 page narrative on how I would make 2013 the BEST year of my life.  I was finally going to finish writing a best selling novel while training to run a 1/2 marathon in Disneyland!  I would volunteer every week at Old World Wisconsin, living out my dream of wearing wool clothes in August while churning butter.   (Old World Wisconsin is a quick two and a half hour, round trip commute from my house.  I could learn a language while driving to and from my volunteer gig.) I would give my children swimming lessons in fresh water lakes while driving to the Grand Canyon.  Finally, I would take the remaining two classes to get my English degree.  (Beowulf and Advanced Grammar.  Never mind that I  got a D in Non-advanced Grammar.)

 

After I finished writing my resolutions, I called my friend, Ellen, to read them to her.  (You may remember Ellen from my "Hot Mess at Hot Yoga" posts.  She was the one who told me to get over myself because no one was looking at me attempting the "Tipping Bird" pose.  I can always trust Ellen's honesty, just as she can trust mine.  Ellen once ran her "Get Your Ass to Class" campaign by me.  She designed it to target all of her tardy students.  Her idea got two definitive thumbs down from me.) 

 

 

Luckily Ellen didn't have any plans for New Year's day since she had time to listen to my resolutions in their entirety.  After I finished reading and was gulping water to rehydrate, Ellen wasted no time in saying, "You can't do all of that!  It is all completely crazy."  Now, this could have been my "Rocky Moment" and I could have countered with, "Oh yeah?  I have 12 months to prove you wrong!"  But I heard the truth in her words and was relieved I didn't have to drive cross country with my kids.  I decided if I woke up every morning with enough sanity and energy to get through the day - that would be enough. 

 

Join me next time when I share my 2017 resolutions.  There are 12 of them, but I promise to keep them brief.

Happy New Year!  May your year be full of "Rocky Moments."

 

Prairie Eydie